why music is my life.

though i have never considered myself great at any instrument i have played, i consider music a huge part of who i am. i think back and believe that i would most definitely not be the same person i am today if i had not touched my aunt's piano when i was three years old. or if i hadn't learned those three simple chords from an exboyfriend. it keeps me occupied. it keeps me a little more focused and a little less stressed.

lets see... i started playing piano when i was about 3 years old. i was always at my aunt's place, where she owned two pianos. i don't know what it was, but i was instantly drawn to it. well... most small children love banging on pianos as well. luckily, my aunt's housekeeper knew how to play and taught me several songs, such as Heart & Soul and other piano classics. my mom, seeing some potential, hired several piano teachers to help me advance this skill. but it wasn't the same as playing for fun. i began to see the piano as a nuisance. probably because my last teacher was like a nazi... i took lessons for 10 whole years and finally stopped. i never became a great pianist within that long timespan. i was pretty average because even though i played for such a long time, i wasn't taught some basic things, such as using the pedals, remembering chords or tempo.

years after i had stopped playing, i stopped by the old piano room and sat down. i found that when i didn't have a senile nazi woman yelling and scolding me for every wrong note, the piano was actually relaxing for me. i found that playing songs that i actually wanted to play was exciting and took my mind off of things i didn't want to think about. i only thought about the songs i played and focused on making it sound perfect.

during the timespan that i took piano lessons, all i could think about is how much i wished i played guitar instead. i wanted to be a rockstar. guitar seemed so much cooler than playing piano 'like a geek.' haha oh dear god.. i always had two guitars in the house passed down from my greatuncle, but i never picked them up. i even asked my dad to teach me but he never found the time to. it wasn't until i began seeing someone who was pretty talented with a guitar. i remember the first song he taught me how to play was from the movie PS I love you. "i will love you till the end" haha such a cheesy song.. but it was simple. so i learned it

pretty soon, i was looking up song tutorials and tabs online, teaching myself every chord and perfecting my strum, which is still pretty off because i'm left handed and playing guitar righty (and no i'm not one of those people who do different things with different hands.)

what i loved about playing the guitar is that i could lie in bed and play the day away, being the lazy butthead that i am. haha. i wouldn't have to worry about my posture affecting my playing, like piano.

i love both instruments equally since they always seem to have a way to empty my thoughts temporarily. i have a ridiculous mind with overflowing thoughts that i don't exactly like to have. my music helps me walk away once in awhile. especially during tough times. my music is my outlet. and life.

i'm so thankful i have my instruments with me.

i don't know why i wrote a whole essay on this. this is a result of playing the piano and guitar all day long.